What would be if not this....

A jobless man applied for the position of "office boy" at Microsoft.

The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a  test. "You are employed" he said. "Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start. The man replied "But I don't have a computer, neither an email" . "I'm sorry", said the HR manager. If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job." The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato crate. He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than
two hours, he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60. The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go everyday earlier, and return late Thus, his money doubled or tripled every day. Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles. 5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the US. He started
to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance. He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan. When the conversation was concluded, the broker asked him his email. The
man replied, "I don't have an email. The broker answered curiously, "You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?!!" The man thought for a while and replied, "Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!"

Moral of the story

M1 - Internet is not the solution to your life.
M2 - If you don't have internet, and work hard, you can be a millionaire.
M3- If you received this message by email, you are closer to being an office boy/girl, than a millionaire...

There cannot be any fantastic answer than this...........

 Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of AIDS. From world  over, he received letters from his fans, one of which  conveyed :

 "Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease"?

  

 To this Arthur Ashe replied:

 The world over --
 5 crore children start playing tennis,
 50 lakh learn to play tennis,
 5 lakh learn professional tennis,
 50,000 come to the circuit,
 5000 reach the grand slam,
 50 reach Wimbeldon,
 4 to semi final,
 2 to the finals,

 When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD "Why me?"

 And today in pain I should not be asking GOD "Why me?"

Advice....but to what extent....???

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!

Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.

TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!

We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?

They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL!

I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!

Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?

Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What the hell is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."  

Formalities....

Queen Victoria was once at a dinner in London with many of London's diplomats. The guest of honor was an African chieftain. All went well during the meal until, at the end, finger bowls were served. The

guest of honor had never seen a British finger bowl, and no one had thought of briefing him beforehand about its purpose. So he took the bowl in his two hands, lifted it to his mouth, and drank its contents
down!
For an instant there was breathless silence among the privileged British guests, and then they began to whisper to one another. All that stopped; however, when Queen Victoria silently took her finger
bowl in her two hands, lifted it, and drank its contents! A moment later, 500 surprised British ladies and gentlemen simultaneously drank the contents of their own finger bowls. It was the queen's uncommon courtesy that guarded her guest from the embarrassment.

"Formalities are created by us ...so its in our hands to follow it or not"

What is love? & What is marriage?

One day, Plato asked his teacher, "What is love? How can I find it?" His teacher answered, "There is a vast wheat field in front. Walk forward without turning back, and pick only one stalk. If you find the most magnificent stalk, then you have found love." Plato walked forward, and before long, he returned with empty hands, having picked nothing. 

His teacher asked, "Why did you not pick any stalk?" Plato answered, "Because I could only pick once, and yet I could not turn back. I did find the most magnificent stalk, but did not know if there were any better ones ahead, so I did not pick it. As I walked further, the stalks that I saw were not as good as the earlier one, so I did not pick any in the end. His teacher then said, "And that is love."

On another day, Plato asked his teacher, "What is marriage? How can I Find it?" His teacher answered, "There is a thriving forest in front. Walk forward without turning back, and chop down only one tree. If you find the tallest tree, then you have found marriage". Plato walked forward, and before long, he returned with a tree. The tree was not thriving, and it was not tall either. It was only an ordinary tree. His teacher asked, "Why did you chop down such an ordinary tree?" Plato answered, "Because of my previous experience. I had walked through the field, but returned with empty hands. This time, I saw this tree, and I felt that it was not bad, so I chopped it down and brought it back. I did not want to miss the opportunity." 

His teacher then said, "And that is marriage. You see son, Love is the most beautiful thing to happen to a person, its an opportunity but you don't realize its worth when you have it but only when its gone like the field of stalks. Marriage like the tree you chopped, it's a compromise."

Awesome MAC background....

 

Self Appraisal.....

A little boy went into a drug store, reached for a soda carton and pulled it over to the telephone.

He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven digits.

The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation:

The boy asked, "Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?

The woman replied, "I already have someone to cut my lawn."

"Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now." replied boy.

The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who was presently cutting her lawn.

The little boy found more perseverance and offered, "Lady, I'll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of North Palm beach, Florida."

Again the woman answered in the negative. With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.

The store-owner, who was listening to all, this, walked over to the boy and said, "Son... I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and would like to offer you a job."

The little boy replied,

"No thanks, I was just checking my performance and the job I already have.

I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to !"

Are we also so sure about our self-appraisal.....???

Tit for Tat

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

  

She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.  
After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond
to embarrassing situations."  
To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200"

Awesome Trick!!!

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card.
The driver owned the car.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Trunk is opened; no body.
Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying officer. told you I was speeding,too

Need for Speed: Undercover

You're Not Good, and You're Not Bad

Need for Speed Undercover has players racing through speedways, dodging cops and chasing rivals as they go deep undercover to take down an International crime syndicate. The game heralds the return of high-intensity police chases and introduces the all-new 'Heroic Driving Engine' -- a unique technology that generates incredible high-performance moves at 180 miles per hour during breathtaking highway battles. A mix of computer graphics and live-action movies immerses gamers in the rich world of the Tri-City Bay Area. The city’s open-world environment features over 80 miles of roads, including an enormous highway system that sets the stage for highway battles. These high-speed, high-stake chase sequences push players to the limit as they fight off cops and opponents while whipping through traffic at 180 miles per hour. An intelligent new A.I. mechanic delivers a realistic and high-energy action driving experience. Going back to the franchise’s roots, Need for Speed Undercover features more aggressive and intelligent cops whose sole purpose is to take down the player quickly and by any means necessary. Need for Speed Undercover also features the series' signature car customization, real-world damage and realistic driving physics. The game includes some of the hottest licensed cars such as the Audi R8, BMW M6 and Lexus IS-F.

The police system is similar to Most Wanted and Carbon.
Even thou it is much better than carbon, Most wanted still rules.....